noticing...

"If the stars should appear but one night every thousand years how man would marvel and adore." ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Faintly visible is Mars rising over the mountain; Thanks SpaceTramp, for the postitive identification

I don't know about anyone else, but some of my favorite blogs to read focus on the person's life and feelings. The writing is personal, often (but not always) introspective, but always about their reaction to, and feelings about life and the surrounding daily events- small and large, inner and outer, good and less, things that interest or touch them-- and not so much about their analysis of the factual events. I don't look for earth-shattering stories or great wisdom, though those can often be found no matter the writer knows or not. Instead I look for some flavor of the real person's life. How do other people think, feel, what makes them tick, care, share- are some of my life questions (the why could be analyzed, but I'll decline for the moment). I don't want to read words about the feelings of others to pass judgment or to analyze the people. But the feelings and thoughts of others, sometimes leads me to understand moments of my own.

I spend my days in some combination of assisting others, living a daily life, and bits of personal introspection, though the types of things that cause me to look within and re-examine parts of self are different these days than thirty years ago or even twenty. I've settled many bits of angst, grown accustomed to many others (shrug shoulders here), and found new bits of things that aren't settled at all (even if I previously thought they were). Delight, surprise, acceptance, new vistas, old ones, aha moments, helping others, tedious tasks, mundane daily living, introspection, self critical moments, and others - all of these are part of the life I live, though not necessarily each in every day.

I am on a quest for self- who is this person, how to live a happy life and what do I think a happy life is for me? Can I make a difference anywhere and what balance between things is the comfortable one for me? It's the same quest as I was on at twenty, but the air changes with every new twist in the journey. I share here in some moments, because it is what is interesting to me about others. I want to hear/read others stories, their daily lives, their passions, their inward thoughts, even the mundane- and maybe sharing mine, dull as they sometimes might be, will help someone else.

Is this being self absorbed, self obsessed, even when reading others? Perhaps. Is there a purpose to my sharing of the mundane and the slightly less so? You bet. Hoping that others will share in return, is only one. But maybe I've got this self disclosure bit, wrong?

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