Tuesday, October 31, 2006

light a candle

just found (yes, I'm way behind on reading) this at Sacred Ordinary. I've long believed that candles can carry prayers if you believe they can, as can incense smoke and herbal smudging....

Go light a candle...

last looks, fresh eyes

"Discovery consists of seeing what everyone has seen and thinking what no one has thought." ~Albert Von Szent-Gyorgyi

This week I'm getting reminders everywhere I turn, about how looking with fresh eyes can be especially revealing. It is a good lesson just before I start my new job.

More info about Szent-Gyorgyi at Nobel Prize .org

Monday, October 30, 2006

thought for the day

"Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end." ~Scott Adams

There's no particular reason I chose that quote tonight, except of course, that I like it and believe it to be true.

It is a hectic week... my last one at the little non-profit. There are regular client hours, a month end staff meeting, one annual client progress meeting, and last bits of paperwork, including one page status summaries to finish up so the transition might be a little smoother for my clients. It is a little sad to be telling each of them goodbye.

The three weeks went by so quickly.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

send them all home

"Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they would be Republicans." ~Will Rogers

I wish there were fewer team players in D.C. and more individuals working for their constituents.

Possibly there could be a big change in Congress after this election... as everyone else finally catches up to the reality based community. I know die-hard conservatives who are finally fed up, though it is difficult to determine if they are going to vote or not.

I haven't the energy for a rant tonight, but I sure would like to see every incumbent gone. Time to start over- fresh ideas, fresh faces, real debate over ideas.... maybe even some real solutions to real problems.

...wishful thinking, I know.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Unconscious Mutterings Week 194

I say ... and you think ... ?
  1. Stuff :: still in boxes

  2. Block :: adware

  3. Ingredient :: spice

  4. Flagrant :: violation

  5. Dandruff :: no

  6. Betty :: boards, waves and lately, snow, comes to mind

  7. Tide :: Mom's laundry soap

  8. Judges :: lots of those everywhere one looks, not so many non-judges

  9. Take it easy :: "Don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy ... We may lose or we may win, but we will never be here again...."..

  10. Chef :: chief cook

Weekly word list can be found at Unconscious Mutterings

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Watch out for the sky

"You go and you buy a lottery ticket. You've got just as much chance of getting struck by lightning as you do of winning the lottery." ~Bill Cosby

My husband's numbers won a sizeable amount last night. (He didn't have the mega number; we aren't retiring and please don't ask me for a donation to your favorite charity or to help your sick aunt.)
Should I be watching out for the sky?

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Lessons to Learn

"Do not learn how to react, but how to respond." ~Buddha

I'm not sure I truly know what that means or if I respond and don't just react... but it seems a good thing to turn over in my mind.

It was a difficult evening, and I confess failure to find a sustainable way to work with one of my clients. This has been an ongoing problem and I prevented her program termination many weeks ago in a last effort. I am her third or fourth instructor with this agency, and no one else will work with her. I hate admitting defeat. It is my hope that another agency can build on the few things we found that did seem to work.

It is an ego deflating moment for me-- admitting defeat-- but several good lessons that I probably needed to know before I move on in my career.

The letter officially confirming my new job, salary, and the start date was on the table to greet me when I arrived home. Fortunately (?) for me in this season, the bad always seems to be closely followed by the good.

Outside, the wind is howling down through the canyons, battering the trees, windows, walls and rooftops. I want to dance with it, but sleep is necessary to meet tomorrow's needs. Maybe I will dream of flying in its arms.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Unconscious Mutterings Week 193

I say ... and you think ... ?
  1. Weeks :: slip on by so quietly, yet so very fast

  2. Cough :: season; wash hands, get a flu shot

  3. Jail :: cage

  4. Produced :: by

  5. ? :: I've a lot of bits to go with that punctuation

  6. Stapler :: paperwork

  7. Next :: moving on

  8. Perky :: ughhhhh

  9. Oxygen :: What a difference an atom makes

  10. Musical :: talent
Weekly word list found at Unconscious Mutterings

Saturday, October 14, 2006

afternoon surprise

"Open your eyes and you will have plenty of bread." Proverbs 20:13


the storm moving in

I'm hoping the rain is over by morning so I can drive to San Diego county to see my sister (and maybe back again on the same day, though that might be a bit too ambitious). With that in mind, the hour grows very late.

Thursday, October 12, 2006

new directions

"The quality of life is determined by its activities." ~Aristotle

It is verbally official, only waiting for the letter to confirm the offer- I have new employment starting on November 6. That leaves me three weeks to help find and train someone to take my place. The wonderful little non-profit with the best boss in the world, cannot match the the offer which is more generous than I expected (though I didn't negotiate and might have gotten more). My new employer is a state agency and I will become a member of CSEA as it is a closed shop.

I interviewed for the last time about a week ago with the director of consumer services- being met and escorted (enthusiastically) by the man who will be my new supervisor (part of the group who interviewed me previously) and who called me to come back to sign and fill out an authorization for a background check, after I was on my way home. At that time, he convinced me that I was his choice and did everything but confirm I had the job. Yesterday, he called within minutes of my receiving a voice mail message to call the woman at human resources (and before I had a chance to call her and hear they were offering me the job!). He was placing an order and wanted to know what kind of calendar I wanted for next year (weekly, monthly, etc). It's nice to be wanted. It does some good things for self esteem- maybe even especially at my age.

But I feel a bit like a traitor- no, worse than a traitor, since I am leaving for money. The non-profit I work for is a wonderful group of people doing amazing work with small budgets in large part determined by the state agency that I will start work for in November.

When I arrived as an older student looking for an internship almost three years ago, I knew right away their attitude and perspective were a fit with mine. They care about nuturing both employees and clients. Everyone has something to contribute to this journey. I will miss working directly with all of them, employees, bosses and clients.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

"a lifetime's happiness"

"If you desire an hour's happiness, take a nap. If you desire a day's happiness, go fishing. If you desire a month's happiness, get married. If you desire a year's happiness, inherit a fortune. If you desire a lifetime's happiness, help someone else." ~Chinese Proverb
(1001 Pearls of Wisom. David Ross. 2006. Duncan Baird Publishers, London)

Tuesday is the day I work into the night. Hmmmmm, is there a better way to phrase that?

At some point in the afternoon, what is on my mind is a nap, but my goal of the day is, of course, helping some specific folks in my client list take another eighth, quarter, or bigger step towards some specific goals. I do feel happy when they succeed at making some forward progress; I have some definite opposite feelings when there is backwards momentum. It would seem that could be a little too much personal investment in the outcome instead of being in the moment and keeping the process flexible...

Monday, October 09, 2006

choice, change, error

"No man's error becomes his own law, nor obliges him to persist in it."
~Thomas Hobbes

Though, some errors are harder to walk away and start over from...

I'm not sure why I chose that quote tonight. I couldn't seem to settle down and pick a single topic, yet somehow that quote stuck in my thoughts. I've made more than a few errors in choice that seemed to set the tone and road for my life for years after. But upon reflection, I know those were a choice too.

On a less self involved note, world and political events have become a surreal nightmare growing stranger and more foreboding by the day.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Unconscious Mutterings Week 192

I say ... and you think ... ?
  1. Opinion :: public; tide turning

  2. Tardy :: paperwork

  3. Peer pressure :: seldom

  4. Grownup :: yup, that's me

  5. ! :: really

  6. Beer :: Oktoberfest

  7. Sit :: for a spell

  8. Shower :: rain

  9. Consumate :: with another "m", completion

  10. Wasting :: "away again in margaritaville"... looking for my lost shaker of salt"...
The weekly word list can be found at Unconscious Mutterings

Saturday, October 07, 2006


"Agenda for today; breathe out, breathe in, breathe out." Buddha

Actually as usual of late, I have a list for today which doesn't have much room for breathing.

I apologize for the silence. I've had too many words in my head for too long... words about my sister, family, fears.. words about stress and coping... words about politics and world events... words about job interviews and work... words about creating a new atmosphere and fresh start in our new home... words about autumn and the subtle changes in the air... optimistic and reflective words about the start of my new year- which always starts in October...

Night after night, the words were crowding in, tumbling, each set clawing upwards to claim priority, until I thought my head would burst. I tend to back out and down during those kinds of cycles- take time to reflect on all of it including why my perception is of too many and too much- but I didn't mean to take such a long time to get back here.

I see the sidebar needs fixing and there are various blog cleaning chores that need attending. I need to re-create my formerly pleasant habit of cruising the blogs of others, reading my favorite folks thoughts. I am going to try leave some confetti and crumbs here regularly, too.